5 Tips to Aid Your Self Evolution

What happens while you wait?

Whoever said  ‘Rome wasn’t built in day’ …  ‘All great things take time’….  And other like minded phrases … must have never attempted the feat of surviving the “build period”. You know, the time between suggesting you build Rome and actually finishing it … 

Your success in achieving any goal  depends on completing  and surviving the process you are undergoing as you evolve.

Are you prepared to make it through the build process?

You have set a goal. You have a plan , you’re working your plan , but there is a space that exists between setting a goal and achieving it . Setting out plans and actually having them come into fruition. 

Whether the goal is to be achieve a physical goal like run a mile or to  grow a business to its fullest potential , the PROCESS can be the hardest part of the equation to deal with .  Getting from a A-Z is the goal… 

It is in this space that some people quit on their goals, habits, and journeys- because the build space has the potential to create feelings or beliefs that do not support the process. Whether its imposter syndrome or impatience… the process is the most important and influential part of who you are becoming. It is in this space we become shaped into a different version of our selves.

So, What happens while you’re waiting ?

How do you stay on track and HAPPY while building your great legacy?  Whether you are a college student ,an entrepreneur, a new mom or a combo of all three,  actually SURVIVING  the process of becoming successful can be the most difficult part of anything we do. 

You can not skip the process , nor should you. The process and journey to actualizing a goal  is a training period to prepare you for the success you are striving for. You can not wake up one day and lift 100  pounds more than you were able to yesterday , but with training, consistency, and a lot of sore arm and leg days – you may find out that your 100 pound goal is only the tip of the iceberg that is your potential. 

Respect The Process

There is nothing more disappointing than feeling like you have done everything right only to be smacked in the face with curveball from life.  The truth about life is ; we can plan as much as we want , but there will always be a few bumps and unforeseen circumstances  along the way . 

Stop expecting perfection. It doesn’t not exist . Instead chase growth , understanding, and joy. Learn to respect the time and effort that it takes to succeed by absorbing the lessons that hide within our circumstances.

Life is a journey, and any goal we set out to achieve will have its own set of victories, stumbles, and lessons along the way . 

We often set ourselves up for failure mentally by expecting smooth sailing and perfections out of selves. Practice self love and acceptance during the building process- allow yourself to stumble and understand that your circumstances DO NOT determine your worth, your value, and your potential.

Detach from the idea of a perfect and smooth journey . It doesn’t exist . 

No one said success it would be easy , but they will always say it was worth it . 

Anchor Your Goals – Connect to Your Why 

When sh*t gets hard … you may find yourself asking  “ Why the heck am I doing this ? Why I am going through this process? Is it even worth it ?”

When you set a goal, the number one motivating factor that will you going – is your WHY. Establishing a why – or your reason/ motivation for actualizing that goal –  is a powerful tool for the dream chaser in us all. With clarity as to why the process is worth the struggle it is easier to persevere and stay motivated.  

This works for things we don’t want to do that allow us to  do other things . 9 -5ers feeling a lack of motivation at your day job while working on your side hustle — Remind yourself of the value the task of going into work contributes to your WHY . Does it give you financial stability that provides for your family? Are you learning skills that will help you transition into your entrepreneurial lifestyle?

When you are feeling off track and unmotivated -Anchor your why to the task at hand and grasp the opportunity to appreciate the process. 

Encourage Yourself

If you don’t know by now, I am a big believer in the power of the mind. Every success and failure we have begins and ends in the mind. If you are anything like me , falling into the “I am my worst critic”  attitude can turn into straight internal bullying when you are dealing with a particularly large stumble in your journey . When you have a set back, your gut reaction is to start to internally critique everything you did wrong that brought you to this point. 

THAT’S NOT THE MOVE.  Yes- reflection and learning from your mistakes is important . But straight bullying is not the move. Could you imagine saying those words out loud to someone you loved during a time when they may be dealing with a set back ?

Heck no ! You would remind them how powerful, shiny, amazing they are and tell them they can handle ANYTHING! That they are made of mangos, sunshine, whiskey ( for kick) and all the sugar and spice.  … So why don’t you boost yourself up like that ?

The words we say to ourselves are powerful. It is important to speak life and positivity into yourself. Positive affirmation from within is magical- the more you love and believe in yourself the stronger and more resilient you become. 

Which is pretty amazing

Don’t Quit

The only time you TRULY lose. Is when you give up. Let me say it one more time for those in the back — 

YOU ONLY LOSE WHEN YOU GIVE UP! . You are going to stumble, you may even fall. You may get off track or even slow your pace but NEVER give up .  You can’t get from A to Z without getting through the rest of the letter in between .

Getting to the next level in anything requires going through a process. A journey that will prepare you for the next stage in your life. Whether you seek to change some bad habits,  master a new skill, or just find a way to let go of the past … everything thing takes time. And in the meantime… you have to survive the process. The tools above are what I rely on when I feel anxious , overwhelmed, or just fed up and ready to give up. 

My story is not unlike many of yours … Share in the comments below how you survive the “build” stages in your life . What tools do you use to maintain sane and strong during the process?

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